100 directions; and who I long to be
some days I want to be a nobody,
just to see if you'd still love me.
some days I want to shed the cloaks of 'identity' I wear, like snake skin;
in the first September rain,
transparent & empty.
some days I want to be a rockstar,
in the limelight,
with all your attention draped around me like honey;
sticky, warm and sweet.
some days I want to be primitive, barbaric even.
I want to be unknown, feral;
some days I want to flee into the welcoming arms of redwood giants,
muttering unintelligible languages,
breathing through my skin,
and screaming through my eyelids.
some days I want to be still,
and I mean to really be still.
to explore silence and the endless plains of my soul.
some days I want to be everything;
from the light on the surface of barely moving waters,
to the wet earth danced upon by silver drops of spring;
from the quiet journey of misty mornings,
to the unpredictable slipstreams above urban streets.
and some days I want to be nothing;
let life arise in these dry bones,
let consistency settle upon my frame,
let peace reside in this heart,
let quietness flow from this soul.
let me be, pure.
let me be, unmixed.
let me be, everything.
and let me be, nothing.